Bob Denn (1927 - 2006)
Bob's Final Game (click "View" under "Annotated Games" after following the link.)
All--
It is with deep sorrow that I share the following news with you. Robert (Bob) Denn, the long-time director of Scrabble club #340 in the Chicago suburbs and founder of the annual ArdenCup tournament, passed away on Sunday, June 25th after a valiant battle with cancer. His son, Jon Denn, was at his side when it happened.
Services were held for Bob on Tuesday, June 27 at
Congregation Solel
1301 Clavey Rd.
Highland Park, IL 60035
847-433-3555
Donations can be made to the temple (address above) or to the hospice center which took such great care of him in his final days:
Midwest Palliative & Hospice Care Center
2050 Claire Ct.
Glenview, IL 60025-7635
Condolences can be sent to his son and daughter-in-law:
Jon & Wendy Denn
P.O. Box 272
West Cornwall, CT 06796
and his daughter:
Hollis Denn
c/o Stonebridge Health Campus
3100 S. Shawnee Dr.
Bedford, IN 47421-5287
I find it hard to find the words to express how much Bob meant to me and all of those whose lives he touched. I do know that anyone who knew him, however, would feel the same love and grief in this time of sorrow. Feel free to read some of the tributes and memories others have sent me about Bob.
Rest assured that the ArdenCup will continue and we're all set for the 2007 ArdenCup. Club #340 will continue to be led by Liz Berman, Lisa Slankard, & myself. If you have any questions, feel free to let me know.
Sincerely,
Jason D. Brooks
Thank you Rabbi. Thank you all for coming to celebrate Bob’s life.
I met Bob nearly 8 years ago while my wife and I were browsing through books at Barnes & Noble. My wife, knowing I had a soft spot for games, especially Scrabble, saw a dozen or so individuals playing in a corner and encouraged me to inquire. A tall, distinguished gentleman paused the clock next to his game board as his introduced himself. He gave me his card, and invited me to join them. Bob was not a man you could say no to, not because he was intimidating, but rather because he was so inviting. I sat down for a game and felt right at home in the cozy atmosphere Bob had created to allow very different people… with a common passion… to feel right at home. On that day, Bob had adopted me into his Scrabble family and thus began one of the most meaningful friendships I’ve ever known.
In 2001, a fellow Midwestern Scrabble player commented to me that he never understood why Chicago, a large, geographically central city didn’t host a major annual tournament. I passed this comment along to Bob and mentioned I’d be happy to help him if he decided to put one together. Within days, Bob had taken me up on the offer, set aside dates, and begun searching for the “perfect” location. Over the last five years, Bob frequently reminded me that it was “my fault” he created the ArdenCup, but he always did so with a grin and a twinkle in his eye.
Bob lived for the ArdenCup. From December through May these last five years, he busily honed and executed every last detail from the player buttons, to the spice drops, to the layout of the tournament area for which he maintained and updated a scale drawing on which he prescribed exactly how much space should exist between each table for maximum comfort and efficiency. Bob would contact me 2 or 3 times a week… giddy as a schoolboy… as he updated me on the current number of entrants and our pace compared to previous years.
Each year, the penultimate moment for Bob came as the first ArdenCup entrant entered the registration area. This was the signal that his Scrabble family reunion had officially begun. Bob was catapulted to Cloud 9 for three days each year as he watched his sons and daughters, from all across the country and beyond, play the game they all cherished.
As we watched each tournament unfold from behind the director’s table, Bob would relay stories to me about different contestants. It seemed as if he had an endless supply of fond memories of each and every player in the room.
Bob’s generosity was unending both with his time and his money. From the lavish Prelude to the ArdenCup he threw at Maggiano’s in 2004, to the ArdenCup prize fund subsidies… which he insisted on providing as “seed money” to ensure the event would grow… and which only this year did I finally persuade him was no longer necessary.
Bob described his feelings for the ArdenCup best last month. As the 146 contestants began their first match, he held his arms outstretched as if to embrace the entire room. He then drew his arms and the energy in the room in towards himself. As he took a deep breath, attempting to simultaneously, see, hear, taste, smell, and feel the ArdenCup he answered the question I had never needed to ask, “This. This. This is Why.” While the degree of planning and effort which Bob put into the ArdenCup took so much out of him. The joy he received watching… the joy he received feeling the… the EVENT… he created filled him 10 times over.
Bob touched us all with the many traits we all strive to emulate. His compassion… his dignity… his class… his understanding… his patience… his selfless pride. These are the traits that had his club members, ArdenCup & Can-Am participants referring to him as a true gentleman… a gracious host… a gentle giant… an awesome person with a heart of gold… and the perfect mensch.
Our club members attempted to express our love and appreciation for Bob’s tireless work of running our club every Sunday & Thursday; and dealing with all of our idiosyncrasies in stride, by awarding Bob with the People’s Choice Award at this year’s ArdenCup. His tear-filled eyes and triumphant smile as he hoisted the trophy were all that were needed to let us know he loved and appreciated us too.
The last time I saw Bob was one week before he passed away. I had gone to his home simply to chat and was unprepared for the change in his condition from just one week prior. We spent over an hour talking and it tore me up inside to watch as he frequently stopped and grimaced with the pain and discomfort his condition was causing him. This was also the first time Bob openly spoke with me of the fact that he was dying. When I was certain he couldn’t take anymore activity I suggested he get some rest, but instead he insisted on playing one game.
For the next 50 minutes, Bob did not grimace once in pain. The discomfort had vanished from his body and the only grimace he made was when he expressed his dissatisfaction with our “kitchen-table” or “living room” efforts of which he found himself on the losing side. With the timer stopped, the pain returned. Out of habit, I reached over to the timer to turn it off intending to help Bob to his bed for some rest. Bob looked at the timer and responded, “OK… one more.” I had inadvertently reset the timer for a new game, rather than turning it off.
Bob’s pain and symptoms once again vanished as he opened this game with a bingo, playing all 7 of his tiles. I followed with a bingo of my own to which Bob responded, “Now we’re playing some Scrabble!” For the next 50 minutes, Bob was not dying… but living as he shared one of his passions with a member of his Scrabble family. Bob went on to win his final game.
When I returned the following Sunday to help his son, Jon, sort through Bob’s belongings, I was surprised to see the tiles from our final game still laid out on the board. They will remain that way forever… in memory of Bob’s final game.
Bob… you lived your life as an inspiration and a role model to so many. Thank you, Bob, for allowing me… for allowing all of us… to be a part of your family. We love you.
--Written & Read by Jason D. Brooks
Jason,
Thank you for the posting. I know how I feel, and I barely knew Bob.
:-( I hope you're holding up ok.
If you send me the final game you played against him, I will be happy
to post it to the site for posterity. It's a very small gesture, but I
think it's in the right spirit.
Thanks,
Seth Lipkin
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This is sad news.
Just last night, the Twin Cities group that went out to dinner was talking about
Bob's contributions and his dignity and wondered if his health had improved.
He had invited me again to Arden Cup this year but I had opted to play in
Seattle, because of my aerospace assignment there much of May and because I had
not played in Washington in a while. Based on reports I heard about Bob's frail
health at his event this May, I have been sad about not having been to his,
though Seattle did put together a fine event.
Bob will be remembered for his various contributions to our game, especially for
his Arden Cup and Cam-Am directing. People still talk about his reception at a
classy Chicago
restaurant.
Personally, he had communicated with me many times. His dedication to chess and
scrabble players in Chicagoland and his total attention to their equipment and
other needs have been remarkable!
I will always remember Bob Denn.
Sam Kantimathi
Sacramento,
California
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He was a true gentleman Jason, and I know he thought the world of you. My thoughts are with you since I'm sure it's not easy on you.
I will have very fond memories of him forever.
Be well.
Joe Gaspard
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Jason and all,
I am very sorry to hear this indeed, even though it was not entirely
unexpected. When I heard, earlier this year, that Bob was not doing so
well I badly wanted to head out to Chicago and make it to the signature
tournament of this legendary director. I'm really glad that my work and
travel schedule permitted this and that I was able to see Bob in person
before it was too late. To my surprise, Bob recognized me (how I don't
know) and greeted me by name. This was the first of many enjoyable
moments during a great weekend of Scrabble (the last was getting a
prize check from Bob's hands).
I regret that I cannot repeat the experience, but I hope to play again
in the wonderful tournament that Bob started.
-AC
Amit Chakrabarti
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Jason,
Thank you for letting me know. I haven't been very active in Scrabble but I
cherished those times that I was able to play. Bob was always the most gracious
of hosts when I attended the club, and this past Arden Cup (my first tournament)
was a wonderful experience as well. I'm sure that you and the others will carry
on #340 in his memory as he would have done.
PS - how can I subscribe to those lists? I'm trying to find the time to be more
active in Scrabble and would like a good source to news.
Thanks, John
--
John Stryker
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The first time I
ever spoke to Bob was long distance to arrange for Randy
and I's entrance into his tournament a couple of years ago. He waited until
after I had finished my business with him and as I was about to hang up he
said, "Ember? I want you to know that I was one of the first people to buy
and read your book. I can not tell you how much it touched my heart. I want
you to autograph my copy when you come here, please."
Then he went on to say all the other things everyone else who reads my book
says, such as, " I couldn't put it down, I loved your style of writing, you
have lead such an interesting life," etc., etc.
I had never even known him and had never met him before.
As with everyone who reads my book, when we met he went into great detail
about his son and daughter and the hardships he (and they) had endured with
the physical limitations of a special child.
My book is a very personal story and so everyone who reads it really KNOWS
me personally and I enjoy the priviledge of being invited into their lives,
since they already know all about mine.
His was a story more touching than my own, I thought, and the loss of his
wife just as heartbreaking as my loss.
He was a gentle giant among men who had a monopoly on sincerity the likes of
which I have never before seen and am sure I never will again.
Many directors have read and reviewed my book in a pitch for me to sell at
tournaments but no one ever put into words what he did at that tournament
about the book. I feel like I lost a best friend, though I only met him
once, he had that kind of an efffect on me.
Today is my son's birthday, and the day when Bob's wish he expressed to me,
to have met Genevieve, will come true.
It is truely a great loss to us all.
Ember Nelson
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Jason,
This is such sad news, even though we all knew it was coming.
I think I'm going to throw my two boys in the van tomorrow and head down to your area so that I can attend the services Tuesday. My daughter is away at a sleep-over camp and my husband is in Europe for the week.
Thanks for keeping us all informed, and I'm so sorry for your loss.
Hopefully I will see you Tuesday.
steph.
Flamingjune42@fastmail.fm
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Jason,
My deep sympathy to you in losing your friend and mentor. I was
lucky to attend one of your
Chicago
tourneys years ago and meet Bob.
Prior to attending we joked via email about the reason for the
tourney's name, and perhaps it could remain the Arden tourney, in his
honor.
Sure wish we could keep the good ones like Bob around forever.
Sincerely,
Karen Moss
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Dear Jason,
I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing the story of your last game. Bob made an impression on everyone he touched. Thanks for all you do to help his memory live on.
Lynda Finn
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Dear Jason, We
just read your message, regarding Bob Denn, and we wanted to
let you know that we share your grief. We know how much he thought of you and
we appreciate all that you've done on his behalf. It certainly eases our pain
to know that he played his last game with you and we look forward to being
able to view it on the club website. Tearfully, Marty and Daiva
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Oh Jason, I was so
saddened by this news. I didn't know him real well, but had played him online
several times. I was able to make it to the Arden cup once and his presence
defined that tourney. His quiet, unassuming demeanor and that smile that lit up
his eyes made meeting him memorable.
Across the virtual board, he was a challenge and was always gracious in winning
or losing.
Sincerely,
Patricia Saito-Stewart
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Hi Jason,
I know this is a huge loss for Scrabble in general, and specifically, Chicago
Scrabble.
Know that my heart is with you, Harriette, Lisa, and too many others to mention
at this time.
May God bless you.
Peace,
John Luebkemann
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Jason,
Thank you so much for sending out the info about Bob Denn. I was mildly encouraged when I talked to him at the Arden Cup --- partly because he said he had gained a little weight drinking the Ensure. We lost a true gentleman.
I send my condolences to you who were such an encouraging, helpful, loyal, and supportive friend. I am sure you made the past couple of years easier and more pleasant for Bob.
Sincerely,
Barbara Besadny
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Bob Denn
I've been regretting missing
the Arden Cup this year since I found out how
ill Bob was. The Arden Cup didn't even exist a few years ago; now it is the most
important tournament in the
Midwest, and it was clear it would be right from
the start. Bob also did a tremendous job directing Can-Am III.
The pre-tournament meal Bob set up for us before the Arden Cup one year was
amazing. Not only was it a great meal at a great restaurant, but there was
something magical in the experience: the people, the conversations, and just the
feel of the event. I imagine the people who knew Bob well experienced that sort
of magic often.
My condolences to Bob's family and friends. It is a pleasure to have known
him and to be a beneficiary, as so many of us are, of his love for Scrabble.
All the best,
Jim Kramer
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I
met Bob Denn for the first and last time at the Can-Am tournament last year.
I was also
privileged to correspond with him concerning plans for the tournament. Through
our
correspondence I learned how he thought, and I was very impressed. He could see
the big
picture, yet he was attentive to the details as well. And of course he was
polite, considerate,
thoughtful and warm.
I'm very happy that I had a chance to meet Bob Denn. He was a true gentleman.
Joel Wapnick
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To
Bob Denn's family and Scrabble friends I send my sincerest condolences.
I never had the pleasure of meeting Bob, but just reading about his great
effort in his tournaments and how players consistently
joined his tournaments tells me what a great person Bob was.
And it was great you were all there with him in May in final days. I know he
made it till then just to show you how much he cared about you.
God Bless you Bob and your dear ones.
Annette Tedesco
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At
the Arden Cup last month, I asked Bob how he was feeling knowing that he
looked very weak, but not knowing and hopeful that he was actually doing better
than when we had last spoken a couple of weeks previous. He indicated that he
was not doing well, but he was real pleased nonetheless. He said, "I just wanted
to make it through this tournament." What the human will can do!
Many thanks to Jason, Liz and the group for all that you have done and will
continue to do.
There have been some absolutely beautiful tributes written and posted to these
groups. Thanks to all of you.
Chris Cree
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My
condolences to his family and to all his friends in Scrabble and in life.
Bob was an awesome person, with a heart of gold. To a wonderful and kind
person, my prayers are with you and your family and friends.
Julia Bogle
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I only met
Bob for the first time at the Can-Am he organized last year, and we
had the opportunity to correspond before it took place. He pointed out to me --
in an unexpectedly and delightfully almost childlike way -- that both of our
names consisted of the acronym RPD, and without fail, that is how we addressed
and signed our emails to each other. It was our little secret.
Bob was the perfect host, the perfect director, the perfect mensch. It was
abundantly clear that the lunches and dinners that he organized, as well as the
goodies that he prepared for us, including embroidered tile bags marking the
occasion, were not covered by our entrance fees. He did this without fanfare,
without acknowledgment. It was obviously his pleasure to do this, both for
himself and for us. His generosity and humbleness are truly an inspiration for
how to live one's life.
Bob arranged for a family member photographer to take our portrait at Can-Am,
and it remained on my computer desktop for a lot longer than a mom with new
pictures of her boys should have. I enjoyed looking at how dapper Bob looked,
despite his obvious illness, at the twinkle in his eye, at his unspoken
understanding that this occasion would likely never be repeated in his presence.
This pained me, and in recent weeks I had clumsily sent him jokes in an attempt
to lighten his day. I'm not sure of their effect, but I do know that our
community reached out to him, and all our ministrations could only be
interpreted by him that he was appreciated, valued, and loved.
As always,
RPD
Robin Pollock Daniel
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Damn, even
though I knew this was going to happen, it still hits me
pretty hard. I'm thinking of all the time that our paths in this
game crossed. Those of us who had the honor of playing at his clubs
and playing at his annual Arden Cup event all got to see what kind
of a man Bob Denn was. It is not often you see someone with a grace
like his. He wasn't somebody one got to know very well, but his
presence was felt by many in this game. I think back to how he ran
his club. He supplied all the boards, tiles and Sam Timers. For
real. He found many great venues for us. Barnes and Noble,
Borders, and the gourmet food section of Marshall Field's (we're
next to the gourmet chocolate section), where the club is currently
situated. Thinking back, I wish I showed up more often. His
presence was always felt there, by everyone. Before I played there
regularly, the members had gotten him a personalized board in
appreciation of his outstanding stewardship.
The Arden Cup was a testament to who Bob was. It was a chance for
those who didn't get to play in his clubs to find out what Bob was
all about. I'll never forget the extravagant reception he put on at
Maggiano's one year on the Friday before the event began. That was
definitely unprecedented (though he would certainly pull out all the
stops again when he ran the Can-Am last year). The venue is an
excellent one. And there are the trademarks bowls of gumdrops at
each board, that are always replenished at various intervals. The
trophies (the eponymous Arden Cup) are something else, too. They're
so heavy that they have to be mailed home to out of town winners. I
wish everyone could have seen when Bob was presented with the
People's Choice for Director of the Year Award at this past
tournament. Those that saw it will never forget. People either
cried or really wanted to.
Over the past few months, I had been going to club, each time
wondering if it would be the last time I would see him again. I
always looked forward to showing up and chatting with him about
whatever was going on in the game at the time. I was able to go to
his place to visit him a couple more times before he finally passed
on. I'm glad I did. It seems like we all know someone who passed
away who we didn't get to spend a few more quality moments with. It
goes without saying that Wendy and I will really miss Bob. It's not
often in one's life that one meets someone like Bob, and sees how he
touches the lives of all around him. I hope that many of you in
this group get the opportunity to come to the Arden Cup next year
and witness his spirit that will imbue this event for many years to
come.
Brian Cappelletto
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From the
desk of Joel Sherman:
On Mon, 26 Jun 2006, Scott pianowski31 wrote:
> I've [never met a] kinder, more gentle man in this community. He
> treated everyone like a friend, a brother, a son, a confidant. He
> knew how to touch people, in such a graceful way.
I really can't describe Bob any better than Scott did above. I was
so saddened to hear earlier in the year that Bob might be on his
last legs. I was greatly pleased that his recognition in _Scrabble
News_ came while he was still around to read it and receive the
additional accolades of folks who might not have met him. He
certainly deserved to know how highly and warmly he was thought of
by our community. I was both happy to attend his last organized
Cup event to see him one more time, and very sad to know it would
likely be the last time. And I promised him I would continue to
return to his event because it was and will surely continue to be
infused with his personal love for the game and all of its players.
Going back to Skokie
every Memorial Day will be a pleasure because
he was there and an homage because he is no more.
Oddly, I found myself thinking of Bob Denn about every other day
since I returned from this year's Arden Cup, and I expect I won't
soon forget him. I've spent *far* more time with almost any other
acquaintance I've made in Scrabble, yet Bob made those few moments
more precious and memorable than most.
Joel Sherman
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I've never
met a kinder, more gentle man in this community. He treated everyone
like a friend, a brother, a son, a confidant. He knew how to touch
people, in such a graceful way.
Damn, I'm going to miss Bob Denn.
- scott pianowski
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This is
very sad, indeed. We played often on ISC and I
finally got to
meet him in person at the
Stamford
in the fall of 2004.
What a very lovely
person he was.
ann sanfedele
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I was
saddened to hear of the passing of Bob Denn after returning
home. It was an honor to have known him. My sympathies go
out to all who loved him.
Carol
Ravichandran
Tournament Director
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A
mensch.
My friend.
MartyM
Marty Marcus
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My
condolences to our Chicago
friends who lost Bob Denn this
weekend. He would have been proud of their performance
Sue Hoehn, Director
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What
terrible news about such a nice, nice man.
It was a joy spending time with Bob at the Arden Cup last year and
getting to know him a bit better.
Scrabble-dom has lost a terrific and innovative director and the
world has one less gentleman in it.
Susi and Ron
Susi & Ron Tiekert
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Extremely
sad news. I cannot imagine playing in future tournaments,
particularly Arden Cup Events (or whatever they will be called from this point
on) without Robert.
My deepest condolences go out to Robert's family, and the rest of the Scrabble
family as well, especially those in the Chicago area who knew him better than I
did.
-Joey Mallick
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I hadn't
met Bob until 2006, so I only knew him for a short time.
However, I was very fortunate to play in his club during my sabbatical
in Chicago. Moreover, I was extremely lucky to have a chance to play
in the Arden Cup this year (I had put off playing in it since its
inception, largely
because it always fell on final exam week at my school).
Bob was a wonderful person and someone that I will certainly remember
fondly.
I am so glad that he lived through this year's Arden because (as many
have said before)
it was a splendid event and one where he personally received a
tremendous amount of love.
I will never forget the hug that Bob and I shared on the last day of the
Arden.
May all of us remember the human dimension to this wonderful game next time
we draw 7-vowels or our opponent triple-triples to win. Bob Denn loved
the game
and he gave so much of himself so others could enjoy it as well. His
spirit will certainly
live on in those that he touched.
Peter Schwartzman (aka, drearth)
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This is
perhaps the most awful news I have heard in years and years. I
feel I must say what is on my mind about this fine person. Bob possessed that
very, very rare combination of class, integrity, generosity and empathy.
Whenever he set out to do something as a director and organizer he did it in
exemplary fashion, virtually always doing the right thing and, all the while,
making everybody involved happy. Man, will he be missed! I just spoke with him
before the Arden Cup, letting him know I might not be able to go. Sure enough,
I was called in to work, and now I feel I regret that happenstance, having been
unable to see him what turned out to be one last time. My deep condolences to
his family, and may I grieve along with his other extended "family", we players
of the game Scrabble, which was made that much more enjoyable by so pleasant and
honorable a gentleman such as Bob Denn.
--------Paul
Paul Epstein
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I heard the other day (Oct. 27th) via friend and fellow Scrabble player, Diane Pietrzak, of Bob's passing. I only wish I heard it after it occurred so I could have been at his funeral.
I have nothing but respect and admiration for the tireless work Bob put in running both of his clubs and in recent years, the Arden Cup tourneys, for which I was fortunate to play in 4 of them. And though the Sunday afternoon club was periodically forced to move from location to location over the many years he ran it, Bob never skipped a beat to make sure that the players always had a place to play. His meticulous attention to details greatly impressed me.
I had been privileged to know Bob from the days (late 80s and early 90s) when he made his trips to George Stone's Friday nite club at 170 W. Oak in the city, up to the end of the 2005 Arden Cup when I decided to hang my hat. Before George moved to Arizona, Bob began his Thursday afternoon club and then his Sunday club which well offset the closing of George's club. Thanks to Bob, Chicago area players always had a place to go.
I always found Bob accommodating, no matter what the occasion. He had a way of solving disputes and problems without returning the anger and frustration brought to him. He didn't always have to say something; his demeanor and character often spoke when he didn't. He was a delight to play and pretty competitive, even in his waning years.
I echo the sentiments of everyone else who posted a tribute to the man. Bob was indeed a class act. My prayers are with his family. God bless.
Nedd Kareiva
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